The Getting to know you song
Do you remember or know the “Getting to know you” song by Julie Andrews in “The King & I”? I have always liked that song since I was a child. Later on I liked it because it is thought provoking and I understood the film better. I think it is more about getting to know your partner. But when I heard it again recently, it caused me to reflect on how well I actually know myself. Taking it a step further I decided to share this with you.
I think it important to take time every so often to check in with ourselves, see where we are and where we want to get to. Forgetting to do so allows life to fly past in one big blur. We forget to set landmarks for the important moments. You might say that only this present moment is important – this is true. However, if we completely forget the landmarks it makes gauging our progress difficult.
How well do you know yourself?
When we first meet someone we are interested in we are eager to learn more about them and get to know them as much as we can. We have long conversations, talk about our past, our hopes, wishes and dreams. Do you remember how it was when you wanted to get to know your boyfriend or girlfriend? It is a very exciting time usually.
Question is, can we ever really know someone? Life is constantly changing and so are we. I know many situations where people thought they knew someone only to witness that person do something so out of character and unexpected it left them, to say the least, shocked. My thoughts on certain issues may be very different now than they were 12, 6 or even two months ago. So before you can really get to know someone, if ever, what about getting to know yourself first?
Why do I need to get to know myself?
Knowing yourself enables you to better relate to others. Your opinions, thoughts etc will be more authentic. Being more authentic means more respect for yourself and others. You are being honest and giving them permission to be honest with you. Getting to know you helps you to be more grounded – you are less easily swayed by other people’s opinions, likes, dislikes. I believe this also makes us less reactive. And in my opinion it certainly brings a degree of peace.
This is all about YOU
You have probably come across a getting to know you game at some point. This “exercise” might lead to you getting to know you and things about yourself you had previously never thought about, recognised or noticed. You might discover aspects of yourself which could be of value in your current life phase, possibly even realising there are things you no longer need and letting them go. Answer the questions as honestly as you can – the answers are about you and no-one else!
GETTING TO KNOW YOU.
- What one thing would be a must have for you if stranded on a desert island?
- How important is honesty to you?
- What are you most afraid of?
- Which book or film would best describe your life?
- Where would you most like to live?
- What would be your absolute dream holiday?
- What is the one thing you would not reveal to your partner?
- If you were the mayor of your town/city what would you implement as your first course of action?
- What quality do you most admire in your partner/best friend?
- How good are you at keeping secrets?
- What is the one thing that you would not compromise on?
- If you could change lives with one person for one day who would it be?
- What did you learn from your father about love?
- I would love to be a fly on the wall in…….(whose) house?
- Is there any one thing you absolutely want to do before you leave this life? Why haven’t you done it?
- What is the one thing you would most like to change about your life? What is stopping you from doing it?
- Who has been the biggest influence in your life?
- What does your best friend most like about you?
- Describe your perfect day
- Which is more important, to love or to be loved?
- What do you hope people will remember you for?
- List what you consider to be your biggest strengths and weaknesses.
- Which one quality do you most wish you had?
- What do you consider your biggest personal achievement?
- Where would you rather live – in a city, in the countryside, in the mountains, or on a beach?
- Are you holding on to any grievances?
- When was the last time you did something completely different or try something new?
- What did you learn from your mother about love?
- When was the last time you took time out to be with yourself?
- What does loyalty mean to you? How important is it?
How well did you get to know yourself?
Was there any sort of fear involved in possibly getting to know you better before you started the exercise? Did you enjoy finding out about yourself? What are some of the new things you got to know about yourself? What surprising things did you get to know? This “getting to know you” exercise is one which can be done at various intervals if you like. It can be a fun exercise or used when you at a stage in your life where it seems relevant to check in with yourself. However, and whenever you use it, I hope it will be of some value to you.
All the best